its been so sweltering hot that ive had to take colds showers in the afternoon to exist in our apartment. it legit becomes a greenhouse in the living room and kitchen becasue the sun shines right into the apartment from across the graveyard and then it never gets cold again. the only good thing about my room is that becasue its a hobbit hole in the ground with 0 natural light, it never really gets too hot in there. ive been feeling the benefits of summer recently and im very happy about it. my favorites right now are:
- the window in our shower because i can feel the fresh air, see the flowers, and moon at night while i shower which is a very enjoyable sensory experience
- unemployed in LA (everywhere is busy all the time bc people in this city do not have real jobs)
- a snack of nerds gummy clusters and yerba (the sugar and caffiene was within me in every sense)
- mochi and red bead and milk bingsu
- bonfire smell of smoke & how mesmerizing smoke is in general
- more plant
when we went to dockweiler beach for mindy’s birthday, we had a bonfire and i just sat there and stared at the fire for maybe like 3 hours. i hadn’t looked at a fire like that since the fires in LA in jaunary and it was nice because i could appreciate it without being scared of it lol. it must of been so crazy to the first person that discovered fire becasue it is legit magical looking. it made me think a lot about why i find it magical and why its so beautiful and appealing to human beings because it doesnt need to be either of those things -- its not a living organism that’s subject to evolution or natural selection. I guess maybe it’s human evolution that we find it beautiful. i was warming my hands by it but it made my hands so dry and they legit smelt like smoke for ages and ages even after i showered.
the other day i scraped my knees and it hurt but im kind of enjoying having a busted knee because it reminds me of being a kid again. i think theres something appealing to my bony bruised knees, idk why. it like makes me happy to see them look like that but not in a weird masochistic self harm way. its probably just because its nostalgic or something idk. it made me think of my friend who skates a lot and often has torn up legs and i always admire her becasue she dedicates a lot to her art form and i think its good to experience a little physical pain because its how u know ur really alive. thats probably why i want to get 5 billion more tattoos.